Always on my mind
by jichulets
Summary: Umi's distancing herself from Clef. Clef reflects on their relationship. Songfic


Disclaimer: I don't own MKR, or the song, or Anoop Desai. (But wishing is not wrong, right?)

**Always on my mind**

It was almost twilight, but Clef was still on the cliff near the castle, staring at the sea. _I wonder what she's doing now_, he thinks. And he sighs.

When the Magic Knights came to visit Cefiro four years ago, he plucked up all his courage and confessed his love to Ryuuzaki Umi, Magic Knight of Water. And although she accepted him and they'd been going strong for four years now, she has been growing more distant that he can't help but think about certain things pertaining to their relationship.

_**Maybe I didn't treat you  
Quite as good as I should have  
Maybe I didn't love you  
Quite as often as I could have  
**_

"_Clef?"_

"_Hn?" Umi was in Clef's study, watching Clef work. He had been busy these past few days, and it seemed that he'd been neglecting Umi._

"_I was wondering, since it is Valentine's Day tomorrow, would you like to do something special?"_

"_Sorry Umi, but I really want my work done as soon as possible, and this might take up all of tomorrow as well. But I promise I'll make it up to you once I'm done, okay?"_

"_Okay." _

That was two years ago. He did get the work done, but he never fulfilled his promise of making up to her for the Valentine's Day he missed. He thought it would be alright just like that.

_**Little things I should have said & done  
I just never took the time**_

"_Clef?"_

"_Yes, my love?" They were out by the seashore, taking a walk. _

"_Well, it's just…you used to say you love me everyday. But now, I don't know, it's just…..it seems like you're being distant from me. Do you still love me?" Umi could not look him in the eye._

"_Of course I do. Don't ever lose faith in my love for you, because you're the only one that I could love, and I would never leave you."_

_He kissed her, and he thought everything would be fine. _

He felt angry with himself that he ever made her feel that way. After that day, he promised himself that he would kill himself if he ever made her feel that way. But deep inside his heart, he knew that he still took her for granted.

_**Maybe I didn't hold you  
All those lonely, lonely times  
And I guess I never told you  
I'm so happy that you're mine  
**_

_It was a warm summer's evening, and he was trying to find where Umi is. He saw her in the castle lounge, but Ascot was with her. Their backs were to the door, but he could see Ascot had his arms around her, while Umi spoke. He stayed outside the door, which was just slightly opened, and listened._

"_Sometimes I don't know if he still loves me." Umi was crying._

"_Hush, don't cry Umi, I'm sure he does." Ascot tried to soothe her._

"_How can I be so sure? He's growing distant everyday…..it's as if he's taking me for granted now. But I really do love him Ascot. What should I do?"_

"_Just believe. Think positive. Everything will be alright." And he hugged her as she buried her face in his chest, crying her heart out._

He heard everything she had said. But instead of making her feel alright, he became so overcome by jealousy that he argued with her about Ascot.

They made up, but he never really did something about Umi's worries and pains. He thought since she was always so understanding, everything will set itself right.

_**If I made you feel second best  
Girl, I'm sorry I was blind**_

But he was wrong. He had taken her completely for granted, because she was always there, and he was sure she will always be there beside him. Now he was paying for the consequences. His Umi was growing colder and she seems to shy away from him now. They seem to be almost strangers to each other's presence now. She's constantly with her friends or with Ascot, and this just makes him more miserable. And he wonders if this was what he made Umi feel.

_**But you were always on my mind  
You were always on my mind  
**_

He wished he could make everything right, and tell Umi how much he loves her and that he never wants to lose her. But what should he do? Everything just seems so broken apart, and all he could do now was to think of her and what should have been.

_**You were always on my mind  
You were always on my mind**_

He was brought back to reality by the arms that enclosed him in an embrace from the back.

"Umi!"

"You seemed so surprised my love. Did I disturb you?" Umi sat beside him.

"No….it's just…..well, you don't do that anymore."

"So you've noticed." Then Umi stared out the sea as well.

A long silence ensued.

"I'm sorry. I am so sorry Umi. You don't know how sorry I am right now." He put his hand under her chin and made her face him. "I've been a fool. I thought that even if I took you for granted, I wouldn't lose you. I was just so reassured that you would be by my side always. I know this is the consequence of my actions, I know what I did was unforgivable; I know everything is just so broken apart now! But Umi, always be assured that I love you, and I love you more everyday, and if you ever find it in your heart to give me a second chance, I'll keep you satisfied."

_**Tell me, tell me that your  
Sweet love hasn't died  
Give me, give me one more chance  
To keep you satisfied  
**_

Umi pulled her face away from under his hand, and Clef felt as though the world was crashing down on him. But Umi took his hand in hers, her other hand caressed his cheeks, eyes brimming with unshed tears. "I'm so happy, Clef, that you have finally realized everything. That was the reason I distanced myself from you this past few weeks. I love you Clef, but a relationship would not work out if only one is making the effort. See, even if I was miserable because you seem to be neglecting me, I could not leave you, because I love you. Never doubt, my love, I would always be here for you, but it's always good to realize your mistakes and make everything better, right?"

Clef smiled. "Yes, and I thank you for that. I love you Umi."

"I love you as well." And they kissed, with the moon and the sea in approval.

_**You were always on my mind**_

A/N: my second songfic! I did my best, and reviews are welcome. I would also appreciate constructive criticism, since I know I still have lots more to work on. :D

p.s. this is a songfic to always on my mind, inspired by American idol season 8's Anoop Desai's performance.


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